Grace Church School

Parents' Association Minutes

May 4, 2004

The meeting was called to order at 8:35 a.m.

•  Co-Presidents' Report

There was a huge round of applause for the May Fair, and thank you's to all the workers, especially Marion Orbe and Susan Abbott for doing the Haul-it days.  Blanche Johnson said it wasn't too early to think about next year, specifically who wanted to head which committee.  She said that the May Fair grossed $30,000

Camilla announced the last used uniform sale (May 11), diversity committee pot-luck supper (May 25), sail-a-bration (May 27), G.C.S. bookfair (June 2), and the next and last P.A. meeting (6 p.m. June 2).

Camilla announced that today's meeting topic is diversity at Grace, and that diversity is a catch-all term for “community.”    She said that one of the fantastic things about Grace is its commitment to diversity, and that many people chose Grace because of its commitment.

•  Co-Treasurers' Report

Camilla said there's plenty of money in the P.A.

•  State of the School: George Davison

Mr. Davison reported that not much has changed in the last two weeks since he last did the State of the School.    He said they had an alumni reunion recently and had a great time.    The alumni art show is up.

With regard to staff changes, Mr. Davison said that Catherine DeVuono has decided to move home to Evanston, Illinois, where her siblings are.    He said that for 2005-06 Susan Stermon-Jones is taking over as chair of the arts department, and Cheryl Kelly will pinch hit as chair of the art department for next year.  

Mr. Davison reported that the new chaplain has been hired - Anne Richards, the former associate at Grace Church.    Ms. Richards will be an employee of GCS.    She will teach the world writers class to the eighth graders as well as the Bible and Ethics classes that Bert Breiner taught this year.    She has an M. Div. and an M.A. in literature from NYU.    She will also run the community service program.  

Mr. Davison is on the board of the Rodpeh of Shalom School, and they're having a meeting on “how to protect your kids from the Internet – a fantasy world with real life consequences.”   In our case, mainly the IM'ing has been going on, but it's a good topic.   Mr. Davison will put the notice up on the bulletin board.     

•  Meeting Topic: Diversity at Grace

Martha Hirschman welcomed Jacqui Peltzer, the founding director and guiding spirit of the Early Steps organization.    Ms. Hirschman said that we have many children in this school who have graduated from Early Steps, and that Ms. Peltzer has also been on the board of GCS.    Martha also introduced Antonio Aponte of the Boys Club of N.Y.C.   

Mr. Davison said that on page 5 of the brochure you get when you apply to Grace, is Grace's commitment to diversity.    It came out of the history of the school beginning in 1947.    The notion that when they changed this school from being a choir school, to being a neighborhood school, they made the explicit decision not to restrict it to a parish school, but to be a school for all the children in the neighborhood.    The vestry of Grace Church realized, even in 1947, that diversity meant strength.    To put this decision in context, this was at a time when Jackie Robinson was still in the minor league, and the army was still segregated.    The vestry of Grace Church stated that they regretted they had no African-American students in the first year, but they did have some by the second year.   Their commitment was to diversity in all forms – religion, race, gender, experience, intelligence.   Since then Grace has added sexual preference.    Mr. Davison believes that the two hardest ones are race and money.    They're the hardest in our society, and the hardest to talk about, and the hardest for any school to work through.    What we're saying in this commitment to diversity is that kids who are comfortable working through their differences with their peers will be more successful in a diverse world.    We're not just doing this to be nice; our kids will be successful leaders in whatever fields they choose, and where ever they live.    You don't learn that late in life, you learn it from the beginnings of life.   That means you'll have to “lean into your discomfort,” as John Matthews puts it.   Are we completely successful?   No.   

Grace is committed to diversity in thought, word and deed.   Sometimes language, the things you call things, are an important part of making people feel included.    For instance, in chapel we no longer say, “let us pray.”    Now we say, “let us kneel or sit quietly as we prepare for prayer.”   It means the same thing, but it reflects the religious diversity of the group.    We try to ensure the language we use does not make people feel excluded.

Deeds are important, too.    Our after-school, for instance, is for people who work all day.     If those parents can't afford their own day-care provider, economically, you must have an affordable before and after school program.    We are open from 7:30 in the morning until 6 at night, at affordable levels.    There's no activity open at Grace, for which there's a charge, for which there's no financial aid.   Mr. Davison thinks everybody should perspire financially to send their kids to GCS.    Those who have extra income, we'll be leaning on them for donations until they start perspiring.    If everyone starts perspiring, we have consistency of commitment.   

Thoughts are important, too.    Take the P.A.    Last year at the auction we had Head for the Day at the silent auction and nobody noticed it.    We could have made a bunch of money on it at the live auction.    But we decided that wouldn't work for this community.   We decided it needed to be a prize everybody had access to.   It was turned into a raffle.    That's what he means by thought.    Everyone thought it up.   You want to get it into the culture about how to make things inclusive.    Mr. Davison added that diversity isn't easy.    His mentor and first boss, David Hume, the Headmaster of St. David's School, said to him that families who come to this school must have two of three necessary preconditions to be successful; 1) they must be intelligent, 2) they   must have a supportive family, 3) they must be comfortable with difference.    Kids who represent difference do start at a disadvantage.   That is why the efforts at inclusion are crucial.

Camilla introduced Hilary Mosher, Spanish teacher and sixth grade homeroom teacher, and John Matthews, eighth grade teacher.    Mr. Matthews thanked Camilla and Pamel for extending the opportunity to have diversity at Grace as a P.A. meeting topic.   Mr. Matthews thanked all the attendees at the diversity committee meetings.   Mr. Matthews aspires to be historian, reporter and cheerleader on this topic.    Mr. Matthews said that when he came to Grace ten years ago, diversity was strong, so he and Hilary saw their mission to be to streamline and strengthen.    Five years ago there were three different committees working on diversity.   Now there's one.   Every month now, there's a nighttime diversity meeting.    They try to make the meetings safe, so people can lean into their discomfort.   You will be challenged, but we hope it will be healthy challenges.   We believe multi-cultural education is the only education there is.   We want everyone to come to these meetings.   Recently we've also focused on parent/teacher/student interface.   

This year our binding theme has been who am I, who are you?   We had a two hour ice-breaker where we got into small groups and got to know each other.   We also had two panels this year.   We dealt with issues of discrimination and saw a video called Blue Eyes.    We addressed the issues of the former diversity task force, too.  

Hilary Mosher added that she and John have tried to make the meetings interactive.

During the day, Hilary wears the hat of adviser to students of color.   She tries to create a space for kids to explore some of the issues they explore at night with the parents.    They can have lunch with her.    They talk and come up with strategies for dealing.    She is also a contact person for issues that come up, or an advocate for issues that come up.   She tries to be as flexible as possible, so it's a fluid role.   

Mr. Matthew said they try to incorporate the diversity issues in the classrooms.    Mr. Matthews is trying to show how ancient civilizations have built our democracy, and how we tried to improve on Greece and Rome.    In the fifth grade plays, Susan Sterman-Jones asks us what our themes are so she can incorporate it in the student written plays.    We try to incorporate diversity issues in the classrooms, without making the students aware that that's what we're doing – it should be seamless, not a token “diversity day.”   

Mr. Matthews said that next year's theme will be ‘privilege.”    He said they will be reflecting not only on white privilege, and class and economic privilege; it should be embraced and appreciated, not something to be ashamed of.  

Ms. Peltzer of Early Steps gave a thumbnail sketch of Early Steps.   She said it was founded in 1986 by ISAAGNY, the overarching governing body of directors of independent schools in NYC.    ISAAGNY decided to create an organization that was an extension of each of the school's admissions offices.    It was created and, most importantly, funded.    A non-profit organization with 45 member schools.   Grace was committed to Early Steps from the beginning.    Part of that commitment included inviting Ms. Peltzer to be on the board of Grace.   Early Steps serves families of children of color.    They used to place half our kids in first grade, but now schools are filling by kindergarten.   People assume that every family that works with Early Steps needs financial aid.   She said that is a misconception.   They also help families adjust to life inside an independent school.  

Mr. Aponte, of the Boys Club, said he was born and raised in the lower east side.    He said that the boys club has been around since 1867.    He said it started in a little church in St. Marks.   He said it's a non-profit organization, but that they take no state or federal funds, only private money.    He said that in 1957 the boys club started to place kids in the independent schools.    Rooted in tradition, he said they work just with boys.   He said they place about 40 boys in boarding schools.    Mr. Aponte said he is a product of the Boys Club, and went to a school called Moses Brown in Providence Rhode Island in the late seventies.   He said we're blessed by being in this neighborhood because diversity is all around.   In order to join the boys club, age 6 to 21, you have to be a boy and pay $1 to join for the year.   We have afterschool and Saturday programs.    Swimming, computer, reading, literacy enrichment, a day camp in the summer for $75 for a three week session in our campsite in New Jersey.    From 8 am to 5 pm. It has three swimming pools, a farm, lunch, sports, classes.   They also have an academic all-stars, for kids struggling in their high school.    They play against the boarding schools in the evenings, and may get an opportunity to go to boarding school.   We test every boy who's a member in September.    From that exam, we start interviewing all parents and ask them to take the SSAT.    Then we start sending applications out.    We also place kids in junior boarding schools.    We give a stipend of $1500 to every kid going to boarding school.   We provide tutoring money for them, too.   

Ms. Peltzer said she thought it was important for people to step back and look at the successes you've had, not just to focus on the problems.   She said there is a lot of good things going on in this school.    She said that we talked about how diversity work is difficult, and the importance of language.    Lucille Clifton, an African American poet, said that we may want to reframe the label for this work, and instead of calling it difficult, say that everybody can rise to the “challenge.”    So think about how challenging this work is, and how we can step up to this challenge.    It's still the 800 pound elephant, but it may be easier to think about how we can move it an inch if we think of it as a challenge.    For instance, people in P.A.'s often forget how difficult it is for people to go to morning P.A. meetings.   

A parent asked, other than your lunch hours do you do anything actively with the students preventively throughout the year?    Mr. Mathews said we try to “combat the silence.”    Ms. Mosher said that in the upper school there are adviseries that meet once a week, and single sex discussions that take place once a week.   Issues have come up in those discussions.    Mr. Mathews said that we try to make everything age appropriate.  

Another parent said how rewarding she finds the diversity committee meetings.   Another parent seconded that.    Another parent said why not call diversity “rewarding,” rather than challenging or difficult.     Mr. Mathews said diversity work is like exercise.   After you've been to the “gym” of diversity meetings, you feel great.   

Martha Hirschman asked what people thought of what she'd just heard at a conference, namely that class may be becoming a bigger topic than race.  

Ms. Peltzer said that people don't understand that issues of class were always there for those with issues of colors.    You were often different in both ways.    Her personal opinion is that we have to look at lots of things.   She thinks we have to be careful not to allow issues of class and privilege to sidetrack us from the work we have to do to get it right around race.    She said that some very uncomfortable topics become comfortable if you don't have to talk about race.    But because of the history of our society, we have to get that race piece right, so we can get the other pieces right.   

Mr. Aponte said that he thinks diversity starts at home.   When language is heard you have to study what words mean, because language changes.    i.e. “homo” can be used by boys these days just to mean “stupid.”    He said we're always fighting an uphill battle because of t.v., and this whole gangster music stuff.    It's become popular to say you're “g.”    (i.e. gangster).    Hip-hop and “g” is cool, even if you're not a student of color.  

A parent of children of color said she talked to her children not about what they are on the outside, but what they are on the inside, spiritually, as Christians.

Another parent of color thanked the school for giving a comfort zone on discussion about race; she appreciated the fact that a parent coming home from a birthday party with her felt comfortable asking a question about race.   

Ms. Peltzer said that Early Steps does not help with pre-K applicants because many schools, not Grace, do not give financial aid until kindergarten.    Mr. Davison said that GCS is one of the few schools that do give first grade places to Early Steps.    Ms. Peltzer said they had 131 kids in schools this year.    George Davison was a member of the Early Steps board for many years, and Cheryl Kelly is now a member of the Early Steps board.   

The meeting was adjourned at 9:45 a.m.

Respectfully Submitted,

Caroline O'Neill

P.A. Co-Secretary